last updated 4/26/99
last updated 5/9/99
Arthur: (239KB 3:41.1) Kajer's Call Fall of 1997
I called Edge Co. back in '97 and I was connected to this guy named Arthur. I fucked around with him and it ended up to be a pretty funny prank. The weird sound that you hear is me using a sound clip from Samuel L. Jackson screaming, "Well, I'm a mushroom cloud layin' motherfucker, motherfucker!" in his excellent movie, Pulp Fiction.
Begnaud: (56.2KB 51.7) Kajer's Call Fall of 1997
I called the Sheriff's Office in my County to get some information but it turned into a sort of funny situation with him and my friend in the background. Tip: If you're going to call a Sheriff's Office or any other place associated with the Police, then DO NOT call more than TWO times and you had better make it convincing. Never, ever threaten the police. A stupid little kid, sure, but never the COPS.
Dry Ice: (156KB 2:28.4) M-Man's 1997
M-Man called Baskin Robbin's and hillarity occured when he asked for Dry Ice. We called a whole lot prior to this and we gave him the name, Avery, and thats why he asked if it was Avery calling.
Billiard:
(425KB 6:33.0)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
"Can I test the pool tables out?
Would they make them out of platinum? Damn it! I
ran out of ink! What's your name?" "You don't need to know
that, sir." This one is quite good.
BUNS:
(80.5KB 1:14.1)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
"We're cookin' up some 'dogs and we uh... need some buns." "I
don't have any buns!" This lady is very strange, but the way she
talks is hillarious.
ButtPlugs:
(397KB 6:08.0)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
"This is Bi-mart, how may I direct your
call?" "Za butt-plugs!" "I'm sorry?" "Spark plugs!!!"
I wonder why nobody understood me
when I said butt-plugs.
Crash:
(61.8KB 56.8) Kajer's
Call Summer of
1997
I conference-called a Pizza place and
acted as though I was in a car on my
cell phone. M-Man was on the
other line and provide the sound FX. My
cue was to cough and then the series of crash sounds would start.
The dumbass pizza guy didn't seem to give a shit if I
was ok.
Creative
Labs: (309KB 4:46.8)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I'm havin' some trouble with my
sound caaard. Whats that acronym again? This one is pretty
funny because the lady is trying to cooperate with a complete idiot.
Dairy
Queen: (93.5KB 1:26.2)
Kajer's Call 1997
"Is this Dairy Queen Brassiere?" "Oh, Brazier!"
HAHA!
Drape:
(354KB 5:27.5)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
I called this dude
a while back and asked if I
could buy some drapes for my
huge-ass window because the neighborhood kids keep looking in on my
wife and I while
we have sex. In order for it to be a good fit, he needed to know
the dimensions. I
told him that I measured
it already and he should just provide me with a drape. He started
to tell me about
how his measurements aren't the same as mine
and I talked
like a dumbass. Its long, but some parts are pretty funny.
Duh!:
(86.1KB 1:19.3)
Kajer's Call December
of 1997
This is a random number call. Sometimes those types of calls
end up bad and sometimes good. This one was pretty good.
Janitor:
(240KB 3:42.4)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
I called this place after the guy in the
Dairy Queen call dissed me. He got me
angry so, in retaliation, I got him professional
cleaners. Hehe.
Kiss
and Tell #2: (427KB 6:34.8)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
There are a bunch of Porn Shops in my
town and every now and then I harass them
buy asking what types of items they sell.
Liz:
(516KB 7:57.5)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called The
Edge Co. again and messed around with this lady named Elizabeth.
We talked about lasers and such. A good example of bad double talking,
hehe. "Is this a joke?" "Uh... no, ma'am." I got transferred
to this dork-ass named Jeromy.
Movers:
(306KB 4:42.7)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
I called this place called Crosstown Movers.
"Can you move a tree?" "A tree? What kind of tree?" "A
tree, you know, like a cherry tree." Hehe.
Oxygen:
(158KB 2:26.5)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
Action Medical can give me oxygen for
my 75 yr. old father who just had a stroke and he has lung cancer
and generally is in pretty bad shape. Oh, by the way, I'm
26 and not a minor, are you interested? I
tried not to crack the fuck up when I heard
Dana's last name. HAHA!
Pam:
(224KB 3:26.8)
Kajer's Call Summer
of 1997
I call The
Edge Co again and get this woman named Pam. This call is compressed
and sounds absolutely hillarious. I
use my "Russian Kajer" accent. I definitely
reccommend this super-funny prank.
Plugs:
(201KB 3:06.2)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I can't remember what this place is called
but the woman is trying to cooperate with a russian tourist or something
(me). "Estimate the size of the butt-plug,
please." "About 4 and a half inches long." Holy shit, thats
a big fucking ass-plug. Whoops, not a butt-plug, I
meant a spark plug for my car.
Praticia:
(181KB 2:47.2)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
Another Edge Co. call and I
talked the "Southern Kajer" with a woman named Patricia, but I
pronounced it as Pratricia. I nearly
put her to tears when I started yelling at
her. HAHA. This one is pretty funny.
Rachel:
(929KB 14:20.5) Kajer's
Call Fall of 1997
I called The
Edge Co. again and talked with a young woman who didn't really mind
me asking her stupid questions and acting like a dumbass.
Warning: A long-ass prank. Some parts
are absolutely hillarious, but I'm not gonna
lie to you, most of it is boring. Still funny though and nothing spectacular.
Reeeda:
(315KB 4:51.3)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
Another Edge Co. call. I got connected to this woman named Reeda.
I ever emphasized it by saying "Reeeda." Another bad example of double
talking. I then went into a stupid Irish accent. I think I
confused her with nonsense talk.
Refridgerator
Running?: (30.1KB 27.5)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I claimed to be a local power company and said that there was a problem
in a transformer in his area, whatever that area was (random call as it
was). "Are all of your refrigerator running or any other major appliance
running to its fullest extent?" That was sort of hard to say.
Try it.
Roil Awards:
(947KB 14:35.8)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
This is a follow up to a call I made to a Billiard
supply. This woman wasn't very knowledgeable about the other businesses
or her business either. Either that or maybe "Loni" was fuckin' with
me. At one part, I was trying not to crack the fuck up when we were
talking about "full sets of balls." This prank is super funny.
Schauer:
(125KB 1:55.5)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I can't comment on this one because of national security.
Scratchy:
(436KB 6:43.4)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
Yet another weird-ass Edge Co.
prank with the "Scratchy Voice Kajer." I got transferred, damn it!
Tattoo:
(220KB 3:23.4)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
A tattoo place. Is there an age limit? Would you like a
philosophical conversation, or how about talking with a complete dumbass
who wants a fuckin' heart on the side of his head. By the way, while
I was talking, I
was thinking of what to say next. Sometimes, pranks like that are
the funniest. This woman was probably a hippie.
Burger
King: (862KB 13.16.8)
M-Man's Call
June of 1998
A harassing call made by the Mix-master M-Man
to the busy body people of BK.
Wendy's #1:
(261KB 4:01.3)
M-Man's Call
April of 1999 New!
Similar to Burger King but with Wendy's.
Wendy's #2:
(188KB 2:54.1)
M-Man's Call
April of 1999
New!
This isn't a follow up to Wendy's #1,
but just a new one.
Series:
Pizza1:
(509KB 7:50.6)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
The first in a wacky series of Pizza Parlor Pranks. It starts
when I'm put on hold. My
voice is somewhat normal in the beginning, but by the end, it sounds like
a fake southern accent. This one is pretty funny.
Pizza2:
(140KB 2:09.3)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I spoke with Izzy's at S.C. Izzy's.
After canceling the pizza, I relayed my
feelings about my former German friends.
The pizza guy wasn't that happy about sticking around to talk with me.
Don't mind the very end of the sound file, I
messed up cutting that off. This Prank is funny.
Pizza3:
(115KB 1:46.8)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called Rick at University Izzy's.
The Southern Kajer is getting pretty common. I
got on Rick's good side even though he couldn't understand the fuckin'
order. I must've said "The dillsn'sausage
pizza" 30 times! This Prank is hillarious.
Pizza4:
(509KB 7:50.6)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called Stapina's Pizza. This is
a cancelation and follow up to Pizza5. This
one is funny. Those fucking Germans are going out to drink and whatnot.
HAHA! She hung up on me.
Pizza5:
(520KB 8:01.0)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called Stapina's Pizza which sounds
awfully like 'its the penis.' I should
have called this Pizza4 instead of Pizza5 because the follow up to this
one is Pizza4. Its just another human err.
Are you confused yet? Well, this lady sure was. This is quite
funny.
Pizza6:
(410KB 6:19.2)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
About a quarter of the way through, I
decide to record it. I believe this
is Pizza Hut. I asked if her fuckin'
voice changed on me. She laughed so I
guess it was funny. Maybe she was just nervous talking to a weird,
hungry for dillsn'sausage pizza, asshole. This one is slow, but funny.
Pizza7:
(151KB 2:19.6)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
This is a follow up to Pizza6. I
cancelled the pizza I made with the help of
Pam. This one is ok.
Pizza8:
(526KB 8:06.1)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called a W 11th Pizza Place and talked
the "Russian Kajer." Everybody including me had trouble communicating
with me. Is that confusing? Good, thats what I
want it to be like. This one is hillarious.
Pizza9:
(295KB 4:32.4)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
Hallo, my name is Igor Ivadivonovichinskiminski. This prank is
totally funny.
Pizza11:
(255KB 3:56.2)
Kajer's Call Fall
of 1997
I called Abby's Pizza on R. Road. I tried to act like a double-talking
weirdo asshole who doesn't know his phone number. HAHA. This one
is pretty good. No, actually this one is really good. You will
laugh!
Here are some other cool sounds to download and use for your own awesome Pranks!
last updated 4/26/99
last updated 5/9/99